TV and Family Ties

Thanks to developments in technology, televisions and other high-tech entertainment devices have become a common part of modern life around the world. Most kids plug into the world of television long before they enter school. According to the Kaiser Family Foundation:

• two-thirds of infants and toddlers watch a screen an average of 2 hours a day
• kids under age 6 watch an average of about 2 hours of screen media a day, primarily TV and videos or DVDs
• kids and teens 8 to 18 years spend nearly 4 hours a day in front of a TV screen and almost 2 additional hours on the computer (outside of schoolwork) and playing video games

Tuned in or tuned out?

Life in the 21st Century is fast-paced and places huge amounts of pressure on our children’s time and energy. Schoolwork, sport fixtures, after-school activities, electronic devices (such as cellphones, MP3 players and gaming units) all demand our young ones’ time and attention. Now add TV viewing into this equation and suddenly there’s little-if any- time left for family interaction and building interpersonal relationships.

Whilst it may look like a grim picture, we are not suggesting that as parents we should toss out our TVs; but that we should pay more attention to what our children are watching and how much time they spend watching it.

As parents we are ultimately responsible for the development and education of our children. It is important to realise that we are the role models that young ones turn to for guidance and direction when facing important life lessons. To successfully guide and support our children, we need to play an active role in their lives. Ask yourself these questions:

• What is my relationship with my children - am I involved in their lives or am I simply a stranger sharing living space with them?
• Do I give my children undivided time and love or are they competing with my cellphone/emails or other distractions for my attention? 
• Have I created an environment where mealtimes are spent around the table talking about what happened during the day?

Feed the relationship
Research shows that families who share at least one unhurried meal together during the day have stronger communication bonds and are more involved in each other’s lives. Mealtime conversations give parents an ideal opportunity to learn about what happened to their children during the day, whether they are facing difficulties at school and what is on your child’s mind.

This insight can help you to guide and positively influence your children to overcome the challenges they may face. On the other hand, if mealtimes are rushed or spent in front of the TV so we can watch our favourite soapie, what message are we sending to our children about our level of interest in their lives? Surely it won’t be long before they feel that TV is more important than they are!

Control the remote!
Some parents argue that although their children do watch a lot of TV, they do this together as a family. Some even feel that this is quality time spent in each other’s company. 
But consider this: How much time is spent in real conversation when watching TV? We’re not referring to the times that you and Junior may laugh at the same joke during a TV show; we’re referring to meaningful conversations that give you the opportunity to really get to know your child- what hurts them, what makes them laugh, their hopes, dreams and fears. 
So how CAN you keep TV in its rightful place and not allow it to replace you as your child’s role model and mentor?

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While there are many entertaining experiences for children to enjoy on TV, it is important to keep in mind what children need at different ages for their healthy development. Children need time to build strong bonds with real and caring people, time for active physical play and ‘hands-on’ activities- and as the parent it is your responsibility to create these learning opportunities for your child.

I wish you all a wonderful and festive season!